U're old, Father William

Lewis Carroll

U 're old, Father William, the young man said,

And ur hair has become very white;

And yet u incessantly stand on ur head -

Do u think, at ur age, it is right

In my youth, Father William replied to his son,

I feared it might injure the brain;

But, now that I'm perfectly sure I have none,

Why, I do it again and again.

U 're old, said the youth, as I mentioned before,

And have grown most uncommonly fat;

Yet u turned a back-somersault in at the door -

Pray, what is the reason of that

In my uth, said the sage, as he shook his grey locks,

I kept all my limbs very supple

By the use of this ointment - one shilling the box -

Allow me to sell u a couple

U re old, said the youth, and ur jaws are too weak

For anything tougher than suet;

Yet u finished the goose, with the bones and the beak -

Pray how did u manage to do it

In my youth, said his father, I took to the law,

And argued each case with my wife;

And the muscular strength, which it gave to my jaw,

Has lasted the rest of my life.

U 're old, said the youth, one would hardly suppose

That ur eye was as steady as ever;

Yet u balanced an eel on the end of ur nose -

What made u so awfully clever

I have answered three questions, and that is enough,

Said his father; dont give yourself airs!

Do u think I can listen all day to such stuff

Be off, or I'll kick u down stairs!